Member-only story
What Is The Cost of Masking at Work?
At my old job, I had let my mask drop some time ago.
Everybody knew why I preferred to eat lunch in silence, and they kindly left me to it. They knew not to expect me to be present at social functions, and when my earplugs were in that meant I was struggling a bit.
Honestly, they were very kind. But I attributed that smooth transition into being myself to me starting out with my mask held high.
When I was new to that role I wanted to make the best first impression I could. So I hid my autistic traits until I felt they were happy with my work and wouldn’t judge me.
Women especially are know for masking well. When I tell new people about my Asperger’s they are usually surprised.
That is, unless they are an Aspie female too. We can typically recognise each other a mile away, and make very good quiet company for each other.
Now that I’m in a new job, I’m putting myself through this ‘good first impression’ phase again.
I’m doing well keeping it together at work. But honestly, by the time I get home, I am fried. By the end of a week I want to cry a little bit.
