The World is Permanently Changed, and I’m Struggling

For the first time ever, I’m typing a Medium post on my phone while sitting in the park. The header image is my view.

I never do this. I’m a draft it in Word then spell check it three times kind of girl. But the world has changed, so I guess I can change too.

I’m a classic INFJ, so at first lockdown was exactly my kind of vibe. I love being at home. I love when the streets are quiet.

Lockdown didn’t feel real until about two weeks in when I tried to go to Sainsbury’s and was stunned by the queue. I walked away, went to a small shop, purchased a bag of donuts and ate three in a strop.

I don’t love change – anyone with me there?

Apart from my donut strop, I was fairly zen about it all for the first three weeks. But writing this from week eight, I’m not so okay. I’m endlessly irritable and miss my usual activities – as introverted and small as they were.

I miss my friends. I miss the ability to take my laptop to the coffee shop for a change of scene. I miss the quiet of an empty house and the noise of life all at the same time.

Anyone else?

I think I was doing fine until we all began to accept that this change is permanent. Sure it may not always be as strange as it is now, but…